I'm Back (2013)

Happy Halloween, Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year. I've been remiss in my posts but the blog still exists. The urge to write endures and so I shall return.

As usual, the subject will probably be eating challenges - things look bright in 2013, and already I have plans to take on several large challenges all the way from Los Angeles to Orange County to San Diego. There may even be a detour to Las Vegas for a 120 oz steak and a few burgers.

This Sunday, I team with Jamie McDonald, Damon Wells, and Kevin Ross to take on an old nemesis: the huge 54"x54" pizza at Big Mama and Papa's Pizzeria in Burbank. We will be joined by two fellow Wreckless Eaters seeking revenge. Wish us well! Happy times and full stomachs await.

Sushi For Dessert

Haven't blogged at all this month, so here we go. Asian Palace Buffet in La Mirada, CA offers AYCE weekend dinner for $12.99 plus tax and tip.

The sushi was above average for the price range. I also appreciated the availability of crab items.

I'm possibly the only person who could mix sushi with a dessert plate. Well worth the price and I'd go back if I was in the area.

Long Day in LA

Recently, I posted my 200th blog entry. Not sure when exactly, but I'll commemorate it now with a tale of three challenges. That's right. One day in LA brought me to successfully tangling with three challenges in four hours.

My tale begins on a random day in February 2012. After visiting relatives in the Los Angeles area, I headed downtown for the Stray Cat Cafe. This small restaurant features an incredibly spicy cheesesteak challenge. Finish it in 10 minutes and it's free! The Spicialist hammered it in about 3 minutes, and he dared me to go and try my hand at it.

It's not the biggest 10" sandwich in the world. I'd estimate it at 2 lbs, but it's the habanero sauce and scotch bonnet peppers that'll get ya. Water is allowed and I suggest you make use of it. The burn creeps in and doesn't really let go. My finish in 6 minutes couldn't have come a moment too soon. OUCH.

They give you vanilla ice cream to help soothe the fire in your mouth. Ironically, the sensation of my tongue and lips burning like lava has remained burned in my memory. Wish I chugged Pepto Bismol beforehand.

My head ablaze, I staggered out of the cafe and hobbled back to my car to get some Pepto Bismol in my system. It was really too late. My stomach was churning like an old car's motor. Standing and walking were chores. Somehow I made it. After resting a few minutes, I walked about one mile into the heart of Little Tokyo.

The next stop was a little Japanese restaurant called Wakasaya. Right there in the window, they advertised their challenge. Free, the sign said, if you could eat it in 15 minutes.

Meet the Bikkuri Don. This is a massive bowl of rice and raw fish, accompanied by a generous helping of miso soup. Miso hungry? Sorry for the pun, but this is a tough challenge. I went after it mostly because I was really craving the taste of sushi.

It's at least 5 lbs of food. 15 minutes may seem like plenty, but it really is not. Rice is a difficult food to eat quickly. And, most of this bowl IS rice. There's just a thin layer of delicious seafood on top.

You're probably thinking I took a risk by attempting this 5 lb bowl so soon after the cheesesteak. And indeed, you are correct. The cheesesteak wasn't huge, but it was still at least 2 lbs. Throw on the ice cream and other liquids consumed, and you have a decent sum already in my stomach.

To make matters worse, the peppers in my stomach started acting up as soon as I began attacking the rice bowl. There was a battle in there. My fight was valiant. Every bite of rice a struggle, lots of water for the assist, and lots of indecision as my stomach rumbled.

There was no confidence in me as I pushed closer and closer to the finish. It was a buzzer beater, the win credited at 14:47. Wow. That was close. Next time I'll be conservative about stacking two (short-time) challenges so close together. My marathon eating needs longer time limits.

My stomach felt heavy right after, but it was mostly the water I took in. The sensation evaporated in about an hour. I spent a little more time looking at shops in Little Tokyo before going back to my car.

The last stop of the day was about five miles away. It was across surface streets, and with predictable LA traffic took nearly forty-five minutes. Thankfully, parking was easy at this last venture. Scenery change was interesting as I went from a mostly affluent Asian part of town to a less affluent Hispanic part of town. The history-geography-economics teacher in me made lots of mental notes. Buildings and streets seemed rundown, but it still felt like a happy place.

This last eatery was called Mom's Tamales. It wasn't situated in a shopping mall or corner office building. Instead, it looked like part of an old home. The iron door didn't look inviting but the inside told a different story. It was a very cozy little place to eat.

For the last challenge of the day, I would be taking on the restaurant's signature dish of tamales. That's 12 tamales of your choice, accompanied by a side of rice or beans, and 32 ounces of drink. That's a grand total of 7 lbs, inside a time limit of one hour (fail and you'll pay about $35). The long time limit gave me a sense of confidence.

For my challenge, I split the tamales: 4 chicken, 4 ground beef, 4 pineapple. They had other choices but I chose to place it safe. Pineapple sounded intriguing, offering the closest thing to a dessert option all day. I chose beans since the Bikkuri Don provided me with so much rice earlier on.

They only brought out half the challenge at a time. The kitchen was busy at that hour. They also feared that my food would get cold and unpalatable over time. My drink of choice was Coke... and with that the clock started.

Damn, was this food good. I'd pay to take this challenge again. The taste and texture of the masa was out of this world. It was like Baby Bear's porridge. Everything was just right! The filling was great too.

I finished the first half of the challenge in 15 minutes. It seemed crazy fast, considering what was already in my stomach. Unfortunately, the waiting game set in and the second half of the challenge became very hard.

It took 20 minutes for the second batch to arrive. Though the cooking time didn't count against me, the damage was done. Getting my brain and body to restart was not easy. My stomach teetered near capacity as I fought to finish the last 6. The pineapple tamales were very sweet but not very enjoyable.

Finishing the cup of soda was the hardest part of all. Sip by sip... finish it I did. And the challenge was over at 46 minutes. I became the second tamale champion and (at that moment) set a record time. If memory serves right, Kevin Ross set a really good time for this challenge later on.

The owner of Mom's Tamales was very kind and generous. We took photographs, discussed the quality of the food, and I received a beautiful black T-shirt proclaiming my victory. He asked me not to tell any of my friends about his challenge.

What a day. It's not easy to come up with a final opinion, but it was certainly over the top. Dramatic. And above all else, fun. Now let us never speak of it again.

3 ft of Cheesy Hell

This is the 3 foot cheesesteak challenge from Hermosa Beach. It's sold at Big Mike's Subs for $30, and you get 30 minutes to devour it. Winners get a t-shirt, a mention on the wall of fame, and a gift certificate for $30.

It's no easy feat to eat this monstrosity. In fact, when I visited this place November 2010, I didn't manage to win this food fight. I had the last bite in my mouth at the 30th minute. The manager refused to call it. Oh well. I'll be back, and next time it won't be close. It's rare that I speak with such boldness but 2012 calls for new directions.

Finishers of the sandwich are elite company of the competitive eating world. Damon Wells and Ben Monson finished it prior to become Major League Eaters. Right after I failed it, Stephanie Torres finished it to become the third successful challenger. Elite company indeed. If I could eat hot dogs like any of them I'd make more of an impression.

So it goes. And next time I go, I'll be taking that grey t-shirt with me damnit.

Grinding the Mill

The Cookie Mill is a small (but busy) restaurant in Azusa, CA. My cousin was the first to tell me about the place, having discovered from Yelp that they have an eating challenge.

But more on that later. Challenges aside, the place makes excellent cookies on site. All categories of flavor... Fresh batches are baked throughout the day and well into the night. You can get a large cookie sandwich for $3, which is just what the college student ordered. It's near a college as it turns out, so the place is consistenly packed with starving students looking for a deal.

Fittingly, their restaurant challenge is a massive ice cream cookie sandwich. It's one of the few sugar-based eating challenges available in Southern California.

As a matter of curiosity, I think it'd be interesting to see how many ordinary-sized cookie sandwiches could be eaten in 10 minutes. The big cookie is a huge novelty. The regular cookie sandwiches are more akin to what you'd encounter in a contest.

Orochan's Bowl of Lava

Ah yes, we continue with a hot story already in progress. The incredibly spicy Special #2 ramen challenge at Orochan Ramen in Los Angeles will net you a pic on the "Wall of Bravery" if you can survive.

So how hot was it? Well, aside from the few noodles, vegetables, and peppers in the bowl, you are dealing  with red chili powder dissolved in water. It's hell in a bowl. It's gonna be hell in your mouth, hell in your esophagus, hell in your stomach, hell in your intestines... you get the picture.

I powered through the bowl in 20 minutes via sheer stubbornness. As my coworker and friend Steve Mucci put it: "There's no pause button with you." And he's right. I drained the bowl mostly with large gulps, but I used a straw at times.

Luckily the friend who accompanied me was not Mucci, but a medical student from back East. What happened next mixes equal parts comedy, insanity, and medical emergency. We left the ramen house in search of some ice cream to celebrate. My stomach started cramping as we walked, and each step became increasingly laborious.

Well, that should teach me not to eat such hot food on any empty stomach (note to self: your strength is capacity challenges. Skip the hot stuff in the future). I stumbled a bit, the pain in my gut enough to make me double over. Within minutes I was laying on the sidewalk in the Little Tokyo shopping district.

A few kids on skateboards came up to me. They could tell I was in mortal pain, but I waved them away. Damn kids, can't you see I'm hurting? Don't even wanna talk. Get on your boards and get the hell away from me.

My friend had already ran to the local drugstore when he saw me doubled over. He nearly called 911 when he saw me sprawled out on the concrete. Well, the future doctor brought me the right prescription: a roll of Tums, two packages of Pepto-Bismol, and a bottle of water. Everything went down the hatch. Then I waited. The rumbling stopped, and I could walk about.

I felt golden again. Couldn't say no to green tea ice cream at that point.

And this is where I should probably forget to report tackling a team pizza challenge with Matt "Sweet Tooth" Cohen that evening, after the ramen. But what the hell. No pause button.

Preview: Lava In a Bowl

The next full post will detail my struggle against a hot-as-hell bowl of ramen. If you dare, head over to Orochan Ramen in Los Angeles, CA and order the Special #2. On this challenge, only the strong shall survive. If your insides can endure this, you may as well start drinking pure lava from the nearest volcanic source.

This is not about volume. It's pure unadulterated heat, physical fire disguised as nutrition. And boy, do I have a story to share.

Shrouded in Mystery

Photo courtesy JAH facebook

Santa Ana Pizza Company started life recently. On Friday nights, they offer a habanero pizza eating challenge. The test is heat rather than quantity.

Information on the challenge is sparse. There was a listing on Yelp but apparently it was removed of late. A reviewer said that challenge winners would get a t-shirt or a free pizza.

There are a couple YouTube videos.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l6UWs8jFKkE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1_kOkKtWU4

Maybe it's not an official challenge after all. Time to pick up the phone. With all the luck I've had with capacity challenges, heat has become the new frontier.

There's also a new huge pizza challenge in Eagle Rock if you want to push your gut. 28" pizza, no toppings required, one cup of water, 45 minutes. Free if you win.

The place is called Corner Pizzeria. They offer you a tasty way to risk $30. They told me over the phone that one man has pulled it off thus far.

Hmmm... eating a 28" pizza with so little water (and in 45 minutes) is a serious feat. It's gotta go on the list!

Alondra's Hot Wings

If you like having to sign a paper to get your meal, Alondra's Pizza and Hot Wings has just the deal for you. These are the atomic wings. Their spice level is well-suited to their name.

This small restaurant has locations in Alhambra and Montebello. I thought the waiver was a gimmicky touch, but the wings are surely hotter than hell. There's no official challenge going on, really more of a personal accomplishment thing.


Well... they make Buffalo Wild Wings' blazin' wings seem tame. By far. A couple bites of these suckers and your whole head is on fire.

Making a Claim

 

 Some companies offer bold words. The La Pizza Loca chain claims that their 32-slice "La Gigante" is the world's largest delivered pizza. It says so right on the box.

 

It's definitely a sweet, saucy deal at $10. What's less certain is if the advertising rings true. Big Mama and Papa's Pizzeria in Hollywood offers both 36" round and 54"x54" square pizzas for delivery. Red Devil Pizza in Granada Hills offers up a 50" round. Those seem to be serious rivals for the world title. 

Well... they all make great food. I was just struck by the wording on the package. Maybe some committee of weights and measures will resolve this issue for us.

Desperado Gang

That's a lot of food. This whole meal is called the Desperado Gang, and you'll find it in Marina Del Rey in a small, friendly eatery called Outlaws Bar & Grill.

Let's see what we have: 2 lbs of hamburger, a thick layer of chili, vegetables, custom bun, guacamole, and a plate of fries. Looking back, it doesn't seem like much, but this was also one of my earliest challenges. Probably in the neighborhood of 4.5-5 lbs, which is on the lower extreme of the eating challenges I take on these days. You have one hour to devour the mess for a free t-shirt and your picture on the wall of fame.

Greg "The Floss" Moss completed this challenge at one point, but I believe his venture came shortly after mine. It had been awhile since I had done anything like this, so naturally I wondered if I would come up short. The hostess had seated me across from the kitchen, and the taunts of the cook didn't help much: "Good luck buddy, there's no way in hell you can finish all that."

Well, I proved him wrong. Eventually. 45 minutes later. This was before I learned the art of pressure, so it was a good leisurely eat. It was actually a really flavorful meal, given all the different tastes, but I could have done without all that bread. The meat was a little crispy on the edges, but it's tough to complain when you get your beef in 32 oz slabs. Eat big and suffer for it.

As I left, the server told me about a really tall, bald guy who tried to eat two of these meals as his friends cheered him on.

She didn't have any names handy. I wonder who that could have been.

Hawkins' House of Burgers

Once again I'm putting aside more important endeavors to write about an old restaurant experience.

Meet the Hawkin's Special, from Hawkins' House of Burgers in Watts. All kidding aside, this had to be one of the roughest neighborhoods I've ever visited. The staff was incredibly friendly, but the restaurant's outdoor dining area was covered with bars. Needless to say I bought my food and trekked home.


The restaurant doesn't offer a formal challenge, but this is one serious burger. 27 oz of pre-cooked beef, pastrami (instead of bacon), American cheese, chili, tomato, onions, and lettuce. It's packed like a smaller burger inside of a larger burger.

It comes in a combo with fries and two cans of soda. The fries were still in the bag. If you like playing "Where's Waldo," you get bonus points if you can spot the second can of soda in the photo.

I don't remember the exact cost, but it was around $10. My kitchen scale indicated that the massive burger stack weighed around 2.5 lbs. It was as delicious as it was monstrous. Messy too.

My last visit was October 2009. I think a second sampling is long overdue.

Day of Defeat, Part One

36" of pizza, one topping, one hour. Big Mama and Papa's Pizzeria in Hollywood, CA offers a hefty challenge to two brave souls up to the task. $200 on the line for the winners.

This was totally unplanned. Spur of the moment. Spontaneity in action. After watching the "Gang of Four" (Torres, Stonie, Gilbert, Excel) battle the Grand Sicilian 54" x 54" pizza for 75 minutes, Aaron Ybarra and I felt the urge to participate. Perhaps it stemmed from revenge for what had happened to the previous team.

[The next post will be dedicated to the effort they made against the 54" x 54" pizza. It's a longer story, I've got a few reflections to make, and I don't make to leave anything out simply because of space concerns]

In terms of surface area, a 36" pizza is equal to roughly two 25" pizzas. Weight is, of course, a whole other matter. This would not be a simple task. Then again, it's not often that you find a restaurant willing to shell out $200 on a challenge.

The pizza came out scalding. After appropriate cooling time, we dug in. Toppings were split down the middle, one-half with black olives and one-half with tomatoes. Olives appeared to be a terrible choice, because the cooks really piled them on. The sodium factor was appreciable too. I liked the parts with tomato much more.

Aaron shot out the gate, per his style. I ate in much more paced fashion, but faster than my regular rate. This was probably a mistake. Going faster usually causes me to feel full earlier, but it's an acceptable strategy if you can finish the challenge item under 20 minutes.


This thing was just too damn huge. I managed to take my half, but Aaron hit capacity several minutes early and our chances were basically written off. I knew there was no way I could take the 3-4 pieces my partner left behind in the remaining minutes. Aaron ran out of room, but I ran out of time.

The manager taunted us by throwing the prize money on the table during the challenge. He even doubled it in the last ten minutes, but I gave off my bluntest comment of the night: "You could put $20K on the table, this isn't gonna make us go any faster."

Well... back to the drawing board! It was incredible to team up with Aaron again, hopefully we get another chance to eat on the same side again one day.

All that salt!! My mouth felt burned afterward. I guess we were all a little burned that day.

Getting Pregnant

El Nopal Mexican Restaurant, located in West LA, offers a signature item called the Pregnant Burrito. The name draws different reactions from people, but it is definitely one of the more interesting things I've come across.

Take 12 oz of white-meat chicken, onions, avocados, and lettuce.... wrap it in a tortilla. Then douse the whole thing in red sauce and sprinkle cheese on top. You now have a Pregnant Burrito.

Before visiting their establishment last year, I scanned through Yelp reviews and discovered that they had instituted an on-going, no-time limit eating challenge featuring this bloated burrito. If you could best the standing consumption record by at least one-half burrito, you would be crowned "El Nopal Pregnant Burrito Eating Champion." Your meal would be on the house, and you would get a special golden restaurant t-shirt. Sounded pretty good.

Yelp reviews at the time indicated that the record currently stood at 2.5 burritos, but that was a bit out of date. Turned out the latest champ had downed 3.5 Pregnant Burritos, so I would need to put away 4 for a shot at posterity. I wasn't expecting that going in... still, thinking back to some of the other challenges I completed, I knew I stood a decent chance.

The restaurant was dark and cozy. I liked the environment... staff was friendly, chips and salsa were on point, though pretty much everyone wrote me off as having no chance of breaking the Pregnant Burrito record.

As usual, the first installment tasted really good. I appreciate avocado, and the chicken was really lean. But eating the same thing repeatedly always leads to the law of diminishing returns: less and less satisfaction from each new burrito consumed.

Even chocolate eventually tastes like asphalt. Extensive buffet experiences confirm this.


Some burritos look neater than others. Presentation counts for less during a challenge, but clearly this fourth burrito was totally soaked in cheese... therefore it probably also weighed more than the previous burritos. Consistency was an issue that came to mind, but I couldn't let those thoughts deter me. I needed to finish.

(Note: challenge pregnant burritos must be ordered with chicken and all fillings, but other meats are available for ordinary consumption... I tried to get a different meat choice, but the manager refused my attempt at variety)

These burritos must have weighed 2 lbs apiece, if not more. By the time I swallowed the last bite, the only thought crossing my mind was relief. The manager offered to give me another burrito, to see if I could press the record higher - but I politely declined.

4 Pregnant Burritos was enough for me that day. I needed just over one hour, which I didn't think was totally awful. It might have helped if they agreed to bring them all out at once... instead of one at a time as I finished them. The kitchen was not very fast towards the end.

Overall, I enjoyed the experience. This was the first time a restaurant challenge had involved the title of "champion." I wasn't sure how to handle it. Silence was my method. In fact, I don't think anyone ever knew I held the record at El Nopal.

My record stood from September 27, 2009 until mid-May 2010 when Jarrod set the new record at 4.5 burritos. My 7+ month reign was over, but my hat was off to the new man. That was no easy feat.

El Tepeyac: The First Visit

 El Tepeyac Cafe is a locally famous restaurant in Los Angeles. Situated in Boyle Heights among small neighborhoods and loads of other eating establishments, it is very easy to overlook. I was actually looking for this place so naturally I found it. That's one time GPS worked out right.

Viewers of Man V Food and other mega-eaters know about this place because of the huge Manuel's Special Burrito that you'll find on El Tepeyac's menu. It's billed as big enough to feed four persons (I guess that depends on which four persons you're talking about - it would feed one of me). I didn't bother ordering it because it cost nearly $20 and no prize was on the line. I felt little incentive to consume en masse.

I settled for the Hollenbeck Burrito con pollo, which is essentially the half-size version of the Manuel Special. The waitress told me that it should satisfy the appetite of two people, though many customers eat it without assistance.

As many other food reviewers have noted, the Hollenbeck is definitely a fork-and-knife experience. The tortilla is not so much stuffed as simply draped over the filling material. There's no way you could pick this thing up and eat it!

I'm no expert, but I'd call this grub authentic. I have a friend who needs to be the judge of this. I just go huge. Anyone who knows me well knows that I'll eat pretty much anything. But at least this tasted wonderful. 

The chicken was absolutely tender and flavorful.... that's what I remember most about my visit. I'd say the beans and rice were decent, but certainly not the star of the meal. The pico de gallo, guacamole, and green chiles added a lot of variety to the overall dish. I didn't regret what I sampled (their coffee wasn't bad at all), but I wasn't physically challenged either. I'd put this burrito plate's entire weight at just over 3 pounds.

Recently, I discovered that this place will give out store t-shirts and a spot on the Wall of Fame to anyone who can successfully complete the original pork version of the 5 lb Manuel Special.

About 10 photos currently grace the wall... no famous faces up there yet.

I'm not sure the prize entirely justifies spending $20 on a huge burrito and a shirt. I've been there before! And you really can't top eating for free.