Time Won't Stop

Once again, I have let my blog go unwritten for an extended period of time.... let me say that I am alive and well, and I am still consuming in considerable quantities. Sometimes life is a bigger distraction than we'd like.

Today, I am planning on visiting Sancho's Tacos in Hesperia to tackle their 4-lb burrito challenge. I found out about this restaurant from a recent posting in the EatFeats database. They opened shop in August apparently. I can't find anything about the rules or requirements - and the listed phone number doesn't even work - but finishers are supposed to get a free shirt and a refund on the meal. I will be reporting on this challenge this weekend.

And, in a first, I will list upcoming posts for this blog.... I will soon be reporting on a recent trip to Red Lobster, during which a friend and I took advantage of the Endless Shrimp special and each devoured 18 orders of shrimp over a two-hour period. Good times indeed.

There will be photos as well.

Garlic in Gilroy

Well, I finally gave in. I had to find out how garlic ice cream tasted. This was last spring, following a much-appreciated visit to relatives up North. I'd passed through the small town of Gilroy a few times but the urge to consume never really convinced me to make the stop at the little market right off the state road.

For one thing, you'd never see the farmer's market til you were passing it completely.... and then it would be a while before you could make a safe and legal U-turn.... so that's probably the dominant explanation for why I never stopped here. It's not hard to find at all.

What of Gilroy? I've never actually visited the major city areas. I've never been to the yearly garlic festival either. It's definitely an agricultural town - there are small farmer's markets and fruit stands all over the roadsides, and the pungent aroma of garlic totally pervades your nostrils as you drive through the city limits. It doesn't matter if the A/C is off or the windows are up. Garlic always wins.

My cousin would probably describe Gilroy as a "drive-by" or "drive-thru" town. And no, those aren't references to gang violence or fast food windows. Those phrases imply that you merely pass through this place on the way to your true destination.

But, like I said, garlic always wins. I needed to find out what garlic ice cream tasted like.

The little shop was cozy and sold all things garlic. There was garlic salsa, garlic candy, garlic bread, garlic butter spread.... you name it and they probably had it. I was only interested in the ice cream. They sold these harmless-looking 5 oz containers for about $1.50 -- available in both vanilla and chocolate variants. I chose vanilla, believing that I'd have a better opportunity to taste the garlic that way.

You got this little wooden spoon with your ice cream cup. It wasn't very convenient, but it worked. I didn't think it tasted half-bad! It was definitely a mix between garlic and vanilla flavors, with all the typical consistency you'd expect from ice cream.

I know many people think garlic ice cream is weird or disgusting. I'd call it offbeat.

Just the thing to eat when you're a little off the beaten path....

El Tepeyac: The First Visit

 El Tepeyac Cafe is a locally famous restaurant in Los Angeles. Situated in Boyle Heights among small neighborhoods and loads of other eating establishments, it is very easy to overlook. I was actually looking for this place so naturally I found it. That's one time GPS worked out right.

Viewers of Man V Food and other mega-eaters know about this place because of the huge Manuel's Special Burrito that you'll find on El Tepeyac's menu. It's billed as big enough to feed four persons (I guess that depends on which four persons you're talking about - it would feed one of me). I didn't bother ordering it because it cost nearly $20 and no prize was on the line. I felt little incentive to consume en masse.

I settled for the Hollenbeck Burrito con pollo, which is essentially the half-size version of the Manuel Special. The waitress told me that it should satisfy the appetite of two people, though many customers eat it without assistance.

As many other food reviewers have noted, the Hollenbeck is definitely a fork-and-knife experience. The tortilla is not so much stuffed as simply draped over the filling material. There's no way you could pick this thing up and eat it!

I'm no expert, but I'd call this grub authentic. I have a friend who needs to be the judge of this. I just go huge. Anyone who knows me well knows that I'll eat pretty much anything. But at least this tasted wonderful. 

The chicken was absolutely tender and flavorful.... that's what I remember most about my visit. I'd say the beans and rice were decent, but certainly not the star of the meal. The pico de gallo, guacamole, and green chiles added a lot of variety to the overall dish. I didn't regret what I sampled (their coffee wasn't bad at all), but I wasn't physically challenged either. I'd put this burrito plate's entire weight at just over 3 pounds.

Recently, I discovered that this place will give out store t-shirts and a spot on the Wall of Fame to anyone who can successfully complete the original pork version of the 5 lb Manuel Special.

About 10 photos currently grace the wall... no famous faces up there yet.

I'm not sure the prize entirely justifies spending $20 on a huge burrito and a shirt. I've been there before! And you really can't top eating for free.

Breaking Some Eggs

The most famous breakfast-style eating challenge in Southern California has got to be the Broken Yolk Cafe Special, which you will only find at the Broken Yolk Cafe. This small chain has several locations throughout San Diego County, the newest of which opened shop a few months back in San Marcos.

I made my first and only attempt at this massive breakfast platter in October 2009, as part of a family celebration. We went to the location in Carlsbad, which is right along the coast of California via the Interstate 5. It was a beautiful city. I regret not taking any photos of the town - apparently the thrill of the insane meal was just too overbearing. What struck me as most memorable were the constant, and goregous, views of the Pacific Ocean.

Anyway, this breakfast was recently made famous by Adam Richman on Man V Food. Adam did it in the more popular Pacific Beach location. I opted for Carlsbad just because it was closer to home. It's pretty much the same huge dish regardless of where you go....

A dozen-egg omelet filled with mushrooms, cheese, onions, and bell peppers, buried in chili and cheese, served along with a mountain of home-fried potatoes and two infamously dense biscuits. I'm not sure if they're buttermilk. The whole thing comes out on a 15" pizza pan for presentation value.

And yeah, everyone in my party was shocked at the size of the meal in front of me. Including myself. I hadn't done a challenge in a few weeks, and I really wanted to do this one because it sounded especially challenging. This would be a feather in my cap.... a jewel in the crown.

Or a hole in my poor stomach. I didn't realize what I was getting into. This was easily 6-7 lbs of sustenance. The over-cliched power breakfast: eat this one and sleep for a week. I was told that only one other person had ever finished this breakfast special at Carlsbad. The manager was hopeful that he'd witness a second.

I couldn't disappoint, could I?

Well, let's just say that it wasn't easy. It was a real show-stopper, requiring every last one of the given 60 minutes. I started with the omelet, which was piping hot but really tasty. Mixing it up with the home fries and chili was a delicious idea given to me by another eater, and I have to give him credit because it really gave the meal some variety. The omelet totally vanished in about 15 minutes.

Getting through the home fries was a harsh tale. They became starchy, very difficult to chew.... and eventually they tasted like asphalt. I relied on ketchup and water to pack them down.

My biggest mistake was saving the massive biscuits for last. They had hardened by the time I powered through the eggs and potatoes. I'm not joking about this - they felt like damn rocks. I could have used them for paperweights or baseballs at that point. 

Dunking them in water to soften them was the only option left, but that just made them really doughy and nasty. I struggled to get through these incredibly tasteless, wet, heavy flour lumps. Somehow I got them down by the 60 minute mark.

Honestly, I was incredibly relieved to have finished. I was #2 in Carlsbad, I had my free T-shirt, and my name would be on the plaque of fame.... and best of all I could walk away from the table.

This was one of the toughest challenges I've ever come across.

....as well as one of the most delicious. You just gotta do it a little faster to appreciate it.