Long Day in LA

Recently, I posted my 200th blog entry. Not sure when exactly, but I'll commemorate it now with a tale of three challenges. That's right. One day in LA brought me to successfully tangling with three challenges in four hours.

My tale begins on a random day in February 2012. After visiting relatives in the Los Angeles area, I headed downtown for the Stray Cat Cafe. This small restaurant features an incredibly spicy cheesesteak challenge. Finish it in 10 minutes and it's free! The Spicialist hammered it in about 3 minutes, and he dared me to go and try my hand at it.

It's not the biggest 10" sandwich in the world. I'd estimate it at 2 lbs, but it's the habanero sauce and scotch bonnet peppers that'll get ya. Water is allowed and I suggest you make use of it. The burn creeps in and doesn't really let go. My finish in 6 minutes couldn't have come a moment too soon. OUCH.

They give you vanilla ice cream to help soothe the fire in your mouth. Ironically, the sensation of my tongue and lips burning like lava has remained burned in my memory. Wish I chugged Pepto Bismol beforehand.

My head ablaze, I staggered out of the cafe and hobbled back to my car to get some Pepto Bismol in my system. It was really too late. My stomach was churning like an old car's motor. Standing and walking were chores. Somehow I made it. After resting a few minutes, I walked about one mile into the heart of Little Tokyo.

The next stop was a little Japanese restaurant called Wakasaya. Right there in the window, they advertised their challenge. Free, the sign said, if you could eat it in 15 minutes.

Meet the Bikkuri Don. This is a massive bowl of rice and raw fish, accompanied by a generous helping of miso soup. Miso hungry? Sorry for the pun, but this is a tough challenge. I went after it mostly because I was really craving the taste of sushi.

It's at least 5 lbs of food. 15 minutes may seem like plenty, but it really is not. Rice is a difficult food to eat quickly. And, most of this bowl IS rice. There's just a thin layer of delicious seafood on top.

You're probably thinking I took a risk by attempting this 5 lb bowl so soon after the cheesesteak. And indeed, you are correct. The cheesesteak wasn't huge, but it was still at least 2 lbs. Throw on the ice cream and other liquids consumed, and you have a decent sum already in my stomach.

To make matters worse, the peppers in my stomach started acting up as soon as I began attacking the rice bowl. There was a battle in there. My fight was valiant. Every bite of rice a struggle, lots of water for the assist, and lots of indecision as my stomach rumbled.

There was no confidence in me as I pushed closer and closer to the finish. It was a buzzer beater, the win credited at 14:47. Wow. That was close. Next time I'll be conservative about stacking two (short-time) challenges so close together. My marathon eating needs longer time limits.

My stomach felt heavy right after, but it was mostly the water I took in. The sensation evaporated in about an hour. I spent a little more time looking at shops in Little Tokyo before going back to my car.

The last stop of the day was about five miles away. It was across surface streets, and with predictable LA traffic took nearly forty-five minutes. Thankfully, parking was easy at this last venture. Scenery change was interesting as I went from a mostly affluent Asian part of town to a less affluent Hispanic part of town. The history-geography-economics teacher in me made lots of mental notes. Buildings and streets seemed rundown, but it still felt like a happy place.

This last eatery was called Mom's Tamales. It wasn't situated in a shopping mall or corner office building. Instead, it looked like part of an old home. The iron door didn't look inviting but the inside told a different story. It was a very cozy little place to eat.

For the last challenge of the day, I would be taking on the restaurant's signature dish of tamales. That's 12 tamales of your choice, accompanied by a side of rice or beans, and 32 ounces of drink. That's a grand total of 7 lbs, inside a time limit of one hour (fail and you'll pay about $35). The long time limit gave me a sense of confidence.

For my challenge, I split the tamales: 4 chicken, 4 ground beef, 4 pineapple. They had other choices but I chose to place it safe. Pineapple sounded intriguing, offering the closest thing to a dessert option all day. I chose beans since the Bikkuri Don provided me with so much rice earlier on.

They only brought out half the challenge at a time. The kitchen was busy at that hour. They also feared that my food would get cold and unpalatable over time. My drink of choice was Coke... and with that the clock started.

Damn, was this food good. I'd pay to take this challenge again. The taste and texture of the masa was out of this world. It was like Baby Bear's porridge. Everything was just right! The filling was great too.

I finished the first half of the challenge in 15 minutes. It seemed crazy fast, considering what was already in my stomach. Unfortunately, the waiting game set in and the second half of the challenge became very hard.

It took 20 minutes for the second batch to arrive. Though the cooking time didn't count against me, the damage was done. Getting my brain and body to restart was not easy. My stomach teetered near capacity as I fought to finish the last 6. The pineapple tamales were very sweet but not very enjoyable.

Finishing the cup of soda was the hardest part of all. Sip by sip... finish it I did. And the challenge was over at 46 minutes. I became the second tamale champion and (at that moment) set a record time. If memory serves right, Kevin Ross set a really good time for this challenge later on.

The owner of Mom's Tamales was very kind and generous. We took photographs, discussed the quality of the food, and I received a beautiful black T-shirt proclaiming my victory. He asked me not to tell any of my friends about his challenge.

What a day. It's not easy to come up with a final opinion, but it was certainly over the top. Dramatic. And above all else, fun. Now let us never speak of it again.

Nobody Woks in San Diego

For some reason, the lyrics to that 80s song "Walking in LA" stuck in my head when I was thinking of writing this post. That's how I arrived at the cheesy title. Anyway, a couple weeks ago I began my 2012 eating challenge schedule with a stop in San Diego on 01/03. I'd be meeting Matt Cohen for an interesting lunch.

J-Wok is located in downtown San Diego. Parking in the area is difficult as usual. By difficult, I mean everything is metered or in paid lots or structures. The restaurant itself was incredibly crisp and clean inside. I think I would have eaten off the floor, but I wouldn't recommend it.

It's hard enough finding an eatery with one eating challenge. J-Wok has two on the menu. The first is the 5 lb Pad Thai Noodle challenge, then with only one previous finisher and a record time of 35 minutes. The second challenge is the Man Vs Wok Spicy Challenge, featuring 30 Thai chilies ground into a small bed of noodles. Eat it in 15 minutes and its on the house.

We decided to order both challenges at once. This was definitely a first. Our server was taken aback, but the request was no real problem. In about 30 minutes we were facing four large bowls of delicious food.



It was an interesting situation. Since we were ordering two challenges together, management was lenient and gave us a 75 minute time limit for both challenges. The more pressing question was deciding which bowl to start with - the big one, or the hot one? Matt and I decided to begin with the 5 lb challenge.

This was my first encounter with a Pad Thai dish. I liked it, though obviously eating 5 lbs of anything is not going to be pedestrian. I needed 15 minutes to get through it, utilizing plenty of fluids, which set a house record at the time.

Then it was on to the spicy challenge. This dish was something else entirely. In hindsight, it was probably a mistake ordering it. Each bite was incredibly hot, and it only increased in intensity. The 5 lbs of food in my stomach prevented me from moving at top speed.. it was torment for lunch.

Something in my head told me not to quit. So I fought. Every bite a battle, saturated with either soda or water. The back of my throat burned, my tongue throbbed, my eyes watered, my nostrils flared (you get the idea)... but somehow I couldn't stop. If I was about to die eating, Cohen was about to die laughing. The expressions on my face were beyond description and I couldn't see them.

And it was all over. The burning sensations were excruciating for several minutes afterward. After the fire finally subsided, the staff congratulated me on what they considered to be an impossible victory. No one had ever taken on both challenges back to back, let alone completed them. 2-0 was a good way to begin the year.

But, as they say, all glory is fleeting. The following week my time record on the 5 lb Pad Thai Challenge was broken by Kevin Ross. He only cut me down by 30 seconds, but no matter. Kevin's the new man to beat.

So how did I round out my evening in San Diego? With a little more phood. A search on Yelp turned up a pho eating challenge at a restaurant called Top 10 Oriental Restaurant. This eatery intrigued me immediately. The name struck me funny at first, but I was more impressed by the fact that this place served both sushi and pho. Those are two of my favorites.

The challenge here is called the Big Stomach Challenge. That's pretty straightforward. Completely consume a Super Pho Bowl, including the broth, in 30 minutes to win a spot on the Wall of Fame and a $5 gift card for next time.

The pho was really hot. You don't get you any cooling time before the clock starts, and since the bowl is filled to the top you really can't dump in much ice to help lower the temperature. I made it a leisurely meal, only burning myself as required. There might be a house record but I didn't ask. My bowl was empty in 20 minutes and I hobbled out of there.

It's too bad they didn't have a sushi challenge.

Food Truck Fiasco

Last July, there was a food truck festival at my high school in Buena Park. It was a trip down memory lane of sorts. There were a few staff I recognized, and lots of ASB students trying to sell me $1 water bottles. I hadn't visited the campus since graduating in 2001. The back lot was now adorned (albeit temporarily) with food trucks.

To add to the confusion, I wore the "White Rabbit" Food Truck t-shirt I earned for conquering their 6 lb burrito challenge the month before. Everyone thought I worked for White Rabbit and wanted to know why they were late. Couldn't tell you.

I was chasing down the Chunk 'N Chip food truck. They have an ice cream cookie sandwich challenge called Tang's Tower. It becomes progressively more difficult as new challengers complete the task. When I went, the challenge stood at 6 cookies, 5 toppings, and 5 scoops of ice cream under 4 minutes. Since speed isn't my strongest suit, I thought this would be a test.

You pick your choices of ice cream and cookie flavors. I don't remember everything I selected, but I avoided any flavors with chunks or crunchy pieces. It looked pretty big when it came out. One guy came out to time me. The early going was pretty rough, but I developed a rhythm and put it away in 2:44. A NEW RECORD. I couldn't believe it when he told me my time. That was a clear victory.

Since I was still hungry, an idea crossed my mind. Would they let me attempt a second Tang's Tower, same rules, same time limit, also free if finished? The worker called his boss and they went for it. They didn't think I'd stand a chance of finishing a second Tower with one already in my stomach. I heard stories now of previous challengers vomiting halfway through their Tang's Towers.

The second Tang's Tower looked bigger than the first, but no matter. I was determined. Using the experience gained from eating the first, I powered through the second in a quicker 2:36. I broke my own record. The staff and onlooking customers were flabbergasted. Several of them believed this must be a simple challenge (since I did two in a row), and lots of people wanted their own cookie challenge. The adrenaline rush from these faster challenges is incredible.

                            

On a sugar high, I needed some regular food to regain balance. Since I was already in Orange County, I headed to Los Cabos Cantina in Lake Forest to use the remainder of a gift certificate towards a 2 lb burger combo. That caused a sensation. It wasn't on the menu, though technically you could custom order it. I finished it in about 15 minutes, though obviously it wasn't a set challenge or anything. I finished my gift card with a shrimp burrito afterward. The burger was better.

Orange County has a lot of great food options. In some ways it's probably good that I don't live there anymore.